render silent

Can't be bothered to think through my cipher, but want to pen stuff down. Goodness. Is there anyone here who can swear before god that they have nothing to fear and nothing to hide. And goodness those stupid human concieved stories to decieve and control people are just so ridiculous. As expected , office work is more robotic than ns ironically And thanks for calling :)

School of Thought

I think i already knew somewhere.. that it wouldnt work. the more i think about it. yet it feels like i should do something. no excess? not enough either sigh.... how to strike the balance

Red and Black

Actually all these little pains and worries are really so small compared to the real scope of what is going on. I know all this yet i choose to drown myself in distractions and what not. and actually on a global scale, the bigger problem probably means nothing. Marius you are no longer a child I do not doubt you mean it well but now there is a higher cause who cares about your lonely soul we strive you reach a larger goal our little lives dont count at all... that doesnt make it any easier just got to accept it

Robotic

At the end of the day, really robotic what a joke, i really like opposites do i? in both senses, Just goes to show how desperate i really am

The hardest test of willpower

Just sitting/lying there watching him drop his defense. i thought i could do it all day, i definitely could but that urge which stirred within me was way worse than any addiction/ or lakerol cravings ever. i am hopeless am i. On another note, in a totally frustating way, at night, when i am doing sth, JUST FUCK OFF AND LEAVE ME ALONE. got anything ONE SHORT FKING SETTLE IT DAMMIT

exchange

o well ~

Turning

Did you see them,going off to fight, Children of the barricade who didnt last the night Did you see them ,lying where they died Someone used to cradle them, and kissed them when they cried Did you see them lying side by side~ so easy to just , a little word here a little word there... but i wont or i will nvr be able to face them. him esp